Which Passion?

If you remember from my previous two posts, I was all excited to do something big, create a change, with my passion.
Not long after that, I was hyped-up about three different projects:

1. Creating an awesome acapella singing group

2. Improving the moral quality of the local Sunday school students

3. Continuing to promote and work on my paintings of wisdom words - nai&Friends

At that time the feeling was as if I was on top of the world! That there's nothing I cannot do. All optimistic.

Until reality hits, of course.

Firstly, it's not easy to get the same level of excitement and commitment from other people to kickstart this acapella project. They have various other things on their plates that keep them from meetings, practising or even shouting ideas in the group.

Secondly, the current volunteering teachers at the Sunday school don't seem to see any major problem with their students' behaviour. To me, and I'm sure to many other outsiders, it's clearly a chaos. Targets and progress are not clear. Respect is merely addressed. Things haven't significantly changed over the past decade, really. But most of the teachers seemed happy enough that the students "feel comfortable".

Thirdly, the restaurant in which I wanted my paintings to be displayed gave no positive response. Management just left my proposal hanging by telling me they may still need their empty walls for something else in the near future.

So right now I'm nowhere near that top of the world. It's back to the baby business. What we are doing today. What will I feed him this time. What game do I play with him........ How do I prevent him from crying!

And today I had a meltdown. I was physically unwell; I was bored with this family's routines; I was tired of having to entertain my baby all the time. And of course, my poor husband had to face all the blaming effects and other dramas.
It was terrible.

God, please help put my mind and heart where they should be.... Guide me to better focus on my priorities.