It happened. It really happened!
My baby was born on October 10th.
That little life who kicked and stretched inside my belly finally came out.
A tiny baby boy.
Life was getting even busier once he was out. As I'm typing this on my phone, he is lying on my shoulder trying to burp after a feed.
I practically work my primary needs around his feeding sessions - I mean my sleeping, eating, showering, toilet breaks and Whatsapp-ing.
That's basically all I manage to do during my post-natal days and weeks. Occasionally I would taje him out to our important health-related appointments.
Feeding has been a series of tests for both of us. First of all, he was born a tiny baby who was a bit yellow - though normal and healthy, thank God. So hence he needed lots of breastmilk to grow out of it.
On my first night back from the hospital I was already crying from pain. Cracked, red nipples. Not fun.
I ended up using the nipple shields for the whole week.
But then we found out he wasn't getting enough food as the shield made him work extra hard to get the milk out. So, back with the sore nipples, I went to the lactation workahop and re-learnt about proper latching. Feeding him wasn't too horrific anymore.
But then I started to get lumps of milk and swollen breasts. It was painful to even lift up my arm. The only way to fix it is through feeding, but the blockage wasn't helping. Tried everything from massages, pumps, heat pack, cold pack, cabbage leaves, to supplement pills. It went on for a few days and got better slowly.
But then my baby lost so much weight as he wasn't able to access the blocked milk as much. He was light, weak, and more motivated to sleep away than to cry for food. We had to top him up with formula milk and thank God his weight is now back on track.
As I'm reading through what I've written so far, it all sounded alright. Trust me, throughout the process I was really miserable. The physical pain, the cries of hunger, the exhaustion, the frustration, everything added onto my stress level. I was snappy at my husband and mum who tried their best to help and comfort me. That also made me feel worse.
And guess what. When you are stressed,your milk supply goes down.
I kept asking myself why God made such system; where a baby can't have anything but breastmilk; where milk supply goes up with the sucking; where latching can br painful in many ways; where stress makes things worse.
It was as if all those trials were meant to train me up to be more patient and to remain positive no matter what challenge faced me.
Maybe that's it!
